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Poems and Songs of Robert Burns
Extemporaneous Effusion
     On being appointed to an Excise division.
     Searching auld wives’ barrels,
     Ochon the day!
     That clarty barm should stain my laurels:
     But—what’ll ye say?
     These movin’ things ca’d wives an’ weans,
     Wad move the very hearts o’ stanes!